Yes, “Gangsta’s Paradise” in Kanizzle-zuss. One of my memories of that first 7th grade dance was a kid I HATED getting in my face during the “minute after minute, hour after hour!” part and mouthing those words at me.

Nah, don’t plan on doing the Billboard Modern Rock charts–I’m specifically trying my hand at pop music. Too bad it’s mostly coming out as boring forgettable R&B ballads.
I haven’t heard “Thong Song” in about 15-20 years. I am not looking forward to listening to teen pop from the 1999 revival, but I will state that I’d probably like it better than boring R&B ballads.

Garage Inc. was the first CD I owned, but my brother bought it for me because he wanted me to get into Metallica. I got into it because of “Turn The Page,” the first Metallica song I liked, followed by “Whiskey In The Jar” and “Astronomy.” Due to “Don’t Fear The Reaper” Blue Oyster Cult were one of the first classic rock bands I tried getting into and was STUNNED when I found some cheapo HTML page offering mp3 downloads and one was BOC’s “Astronomy.” I now easily prefer the BOC version, and of the three Metallica songs I mentioned, I still like “Whiskey In The Jar’ the best. I still LIKE “Turn The Page,” but I will say that an awareness that LOTS of Metallica fans absolutely hate it (and Garage Inc., which I still have some affinity for, isn’t held in terribly high regard either) hasn’t done it much in the way of favors. Then it was Ride The Lightning and …And Justice For All and the Black Album. I still think RTL is a classic, AJAF has five or six good songs out of nine (but tracks 6 through 8 are a HIDEOUS dead spot) even though it’s horribly produced and a bitch to sit through, and the Black Album…well, it’s more good than bad, but I listen to it very little these days. The first three songs on it are the best, but I don’t really care about “Wherever I May Roam” (the biting hardass tone of the song clash amusingly with the harmless lyrics) and those power ballads aren’t really capable of moving me to tears anymore either.

I am unaware of this Load/Reload re-evaluation. Are you fucking with me? Are you going to tell me that St. Anger is next? The only defense I’ve ever heard of that turd is your buddy John McFerrin saying that it’s not an “album album” but rather “the album equivalent of taking a gigantic dump after being horribly constipated for three days.” People are STILL making horrible fun of the sewage-pipe snare sound, read the comments for the title track (the one song I kind of like from the album) and it’s people just endlessly making fun of the snare. I do remember the jokes about them cutting their hair.

Sydney Sweeney tried to be a serious actress by playing the boxer Christy Martin in some serious drama last year and nobody in the world went to go see it at all because they want her to be hot, so she went back to doing hardcore nude scenes on that Euphoria show which I have no plans of watching. I did however watch some of her nude scenes, which involved a guy sucking on her tits for real like there’s no tomorrow, then fucking her dog style. Looks like a REALLY exploitative show. How long is the shelf life of stuff like that?
Oh tits. Uhm, I see “lactation lounges” all over the place now. I guess that’s an okay solution so people don’t have to feel guilty about flinching at public breastfeeding.
One somewhat conservative talking point that has stuck with me about tits is how a woman will be called “brave” for appearing on a magazine cover or photo shoot in any sort of nude capacity that makes her look anything less than conventionally gorgeous (pregnant, scars, surgery, shaved head, etc.) but it’s for women only, “call me when Men’s Health puts a guy with a beer belly on their cover.” As for the Muslim bit you posted, I’m reminded of an article written by some left wing feminist I read once, that had her wondering if women in burqas “must feel so hot.” Sounded like something a smart but misguided teenager would come up with. Am I wrong? I could be wrong.

The “late 90s alt rock guys are old now” moment that has stuck with me most is seeing the Mighty Mighty Bosstones (probably better known for being the band at the party in Clueless, which people are still watching, than their hit song…or ARE they? I guess their hit hasn’t been forgotten) appearing on the Jimmy Kimmel show with a ton of little kids onstage dancing the way that one guy used to dance on stage with them.